Posted by January Harshe on July 2, 2009
Everyone has been asking for our birth story. I was so excited that I was going to write it all out and post it right away. Every time I opened up a fresh, “add new post” page, I became frozen. When the baby was a few days old, Brandon and I were watching a movie that was kind of emotional. When it ended I began to cry and some feelings came out (this happens a lot post partum!).
I realized that my birth was so special and sacred this time that I can’t just post it, details and all, on a blog for the whole world to read. It was too intimate for that. If you haven’t had a natural childbirth, you may or may not understand. I didn’t before this birth. And I even had a VBA2C last time, but it wasn’t intimate and natural!
So, I apologize if this is a let down. I am going to share how the birth went, but the details and beauty of it I am keeping to myself. If I know you and begin talking to you and feel comfortable sharing details with you, then I will, but not like this…on the internet!
Here is an overview. It still seems like I am sharing a lot, but there was so much more!
My labor was 20 hours long, beginning Tuesday morning at 9 am after nursing my 20 month old. This is very short for me in comparison to my last 2 labors. It was perfect actually. I labored on my own all day. Brandon took care of the kids. I did whatever felt natural. I layed down a lot and rested, ate, went potty, etc. The contractions were about 5 minutes apart all day.
I just relaxed like I had practiced with all the prodromal labor I had for weeks previous. I visualized and practiced positive self talk (to myself.) It was amazing to just give over and relax. My labor was NOT painful at all. It could have been. I really learned with this birth that it is mostly mental. It’s not about tolerating pain, it’s about giving over to the process of birth and having no fear!
Once all the kids were in bed and asleep (about 9 pm), I layed down with Brandon and we rested. I labored between my bedroom like that and in the kitchen leaning over our high counter. I received a text from my friend Tiana and saw it was around midnight. At this point things were picking up more. She was the only person I told I was in labor. A lot of people called me that day actually. I was on their radar! We didn’t want anyone to know we were in labor. Tiana just text me at the right time, I guess, and I felt better after texting with her.
All day I groaned and moaned through my contractions. I was getting a little more vocal and tired in the early hours of the morning. I started to question things. I realized I must be getting close to transition. This is when Brandon’s support really helped. He prayed for me a ton and talked to me and would help center me. This is also when I realizied that I had to COMPLETELY give over so I didn’t stall my labor like the last two times.
I finally got in the tub. After Brandon and I prayed and talked, I mentally went into myself. You know how you see or hear of women being SILENT, that was me!!! I just went into the contractions and after a few of these, my water broke in the tub. It was so cool.
I got out of the tub and was having a hard time relaxing. I was getting shaky and kinda questioning my sanity! LOL. On the flip side of that though, I also told myself that I was in transition. I knew what was going on. I continued to trust in birth, trust in God and trust myself. I believed in my body and knew everything was OK. The baby was moving all throughout my labor (she was high and working herself into a good position) and I never once felt I would need to transfer. What faith!
I got back in the tub and went back into myself. I got silent again. After a while, my feet starting getting numb, so I got on hands and knees and it was INTENSE. I got out of the tub and went potty. All of a sudden the contractions were super intense! I couldn’t continue being silent. I worked really hard to breathe through them, but I was pushing too! I couldn’t believe it because the baby had still been high.
Our 20 month old woke up and she and Brandon watched me as I breathed and pushed. There were only 6-7 contractions like this. After about 3, we felt and her head was in the birth canal. After about 2 more she was crowning and in one more contraction she slid out into Brandon’s waiting hands. I birthed her standing in a half squat. It was amazing. The details of this part are so emotional and beautiful. This was just a quick summary. For this blog though, I will share that we were ecstatic and of course in a “we did it!” excitement. She was purple and took a minute to pink up. She was just so quiet. It was extremely peaceful. Our 20 month old was yelling “BABY! BABY! BABY!” and loved it. Brandon announced she was a girl.
I birthed the placenta easily and we had to work a bit to get my bleeding down. This was the first time my body gave birth with NO INTERFERENCE! I continued to have faith and my body got the hang of it. After getting all cleaned up, Brandon, myself our 20 month old and baby bonded. No one to poke, prod and place fears on us. The older 2 children woke up a few hours after she was born and were so happy we were home. Our oldest cut the cord about 3 hours after the birth (we had promised her she could). Our son was ecstatic because he was right…she was a girl!
It has been an amazing experience, to say the least. Being in my own home with my family and bonding with our new baby has been relaxing. No trauma, no outside interference. Just birth.
Here are Brandon and I just hours after her birth. I have more pictures on my family blog for those of you I know in real life. 
Posted by January Harshe on June 19, 2009
I had someone suggest to me that I plan something as if I’m not pregnant. Like, really plan it down to the details. I said I’d go on a trip with my husband. He said plan it…now! Forget about the birth, put all your energy into planning this trip. Well, I kinda planned two!
We are going away this weekend to see a very good friend of mine who I have not seen in nine years! We talk daily (usually on Facebook…lol) and I miss her. I can not wait to see her and her family. I haven’t met her sweet two year old son yet and she can meet my children as well!
I don’t think many women would take a weekend trip at 42 weeks pregnant! Why not though? I don’t have to be close to an OB or a midwife. No one is pressuring me to induce (natural remedies or not). No one is ‘dropping me’ from care. There isn’t anyone I am allowing to put fears into my mind about it. So, we are packing up and heading out this afternoon! Brandon is totally up for it to. Something other than chiropractic and birth!
So, I’ll pack a bag of birth supplies, let go of the birth even happening and enjoy my weekend with a beautiful friend! Ahhhh…the perks of an unassisted birth! I am ecstatic, because this is so me…to do something spontaneous and crazy. I hope you all have a great weekend as well! When I get back I’ll let you know about mini trip number two.
Posted by January Harshe on June 5, 2009
OK, I am still here. I was kinda not in a good mood after last weekend and thought I wasn’t going to post again until the baby arrived. However, I think this post is worth it.
Disclaimer: This is a very feisty post. If you are easily offended, skip it.
Being a 9 month pregnant women, you are subject to many questions and comments. People just do NOT get it. On top of that, being a mama who is having an open unassisted pregnancy and birth…well, I’ll just let you use your imagination because right now I might not be so nice.
So, let’s begin:
“You are still pregnant?”
Really? No freakin’ way. I totally didn’t realize. Come on guys…if you see the huge belly and no baby in my arms, do you really need to ask or point it out?
The infamous…“When are you due?”
Now, this one is fun for me. I have been telling people, “In June” and leaving it at that. So, for all of those who really want to know I am “due” June 7th. Now, due for what, I don’t know. My response is going to be, “Yesterday” (or however long ago it was). Then I follow up with, “But I always go late”. That seems to reassure people and is easier then me getting into a long drawn out explanation and education series on how ‘due dates’ are a bunch of CRAP!
Followed up by…“They must have gotten your dates wrong” or “I think they got your dates wrong”
First of all, who the heck is they and why do they have a say? No, we were not wrong about our due dates. They are based off your last menstrual period. We were trying to get pregnant, so we know within the week. However (and I’m not going to go into details of all the ways due dates can be wrong), I could ovulate late. So, yes, there is a little grace period even with me knowing.
I will tell you this (and you nosy, gossipy people will like it b/c it’s totally too much information), I know without a doubt this time when my ‘due date’ is because it is based off my actual ovulation date. And since they weren’t in my living room when my husband and I were conceiving, then they don’t know what they are talking about and I do (because I was there!)
Oh, and even still, I’m not a ticking bomb. I am growing a baby. This baby has it’s own ‘due date’ and only he/she and Heavenly Father know it.
“So, when do you think you’ll have the baby”.
“When do you think I’ll have the baby?” “I don’t know, when he or she is ready”. Wow, what a concept.
“What are you going to do with your other kids when you are in labor?”
We have a closet with a lock. No, seriously though, we don’t know. If they are resting/sleeping then we’ll leave them be. If they are awake, well heck, they live here too! This is their home, their baby sister/brother and honestly, they want to be here. So, we’ll see and let you know after. K?
“Are you ready to pop this kid out?”
I think if someone asks this again I might just pop them. Of course I am ready, but this is not about me. This is about my baby. It is the baby’s birth, not mine. This isn’t going to happen until he/she is ready, not when I’m ready!
“Are you worried/anxious”
As much as any other (almost) 40 week pregnant woman. I’m not an alien. Actually I would be more worried if I were having a hospital birth. Yes, I know things can happen. But, they can happen anywhere and it’s been my experience that more ‘bad’ things happen in the hospital then out of one.
“Do you have a back up plan”
“Yes, I do live only 5 minutes from a hospital. And that is what they are for…emergencies”. If everything is normal, I don’t need to be in one. If something is wrong, then I do. Just because I don’t choose to start out in one (because I think birth is normal and safe), doesn’t mean I’m going to stay home at all costs. Geesh.
Moving on…
Now, the stares really get me. All the people in real life who know me and just stare. They are comfortable talking about it behind my back, but not to ME! Blows my mind. Hello!!! I am blogging about it. You can talk to me.
Maybe people don’t know what to ask when the regular questions don’t apply to an unassisted birth. For example, “Who is your doctor?” “Which hospital are you delivering at?” “Will you get induced if you go past your ‘due date’?” “Are you getting an epidural, episiotomy, internal monitoring, and slip in any other hundreds of interventions”.
However, because I am so ‘different’ why not ask different questions? If you are just too uncomfortable or worried because of your own fears of childbirth, then you can just keep reading the blog, staring, whispering and praying. I do appreciate the prayers at least.
I am here, I am pregnant and I am faithful. I am looking forward to and excited about a great home birth. I am not crazy, just educated and opinionated about what happens to my body and my baby. I adore my family. I have a stronger relationship with the Lord because of this journey. Does that make it easy and perfect? No. It makes my journey full of growth, excitement and fulfillment. I’ll take it!
If I didn’t answer a question or address something, by all means, ask away in the comments (at your own risk)! 
