Why Unassisted Pregnancy And Childbirth This Time Around?
Posted by January Harshe on May 28, 2009
(Editor’s note: This is a guest post by my husband Brandon Harshe. He blogs about Upper Cervical Chiropractic at The Atlas of Life.)
I know a lot of people read this blog and are intrigued by the idea of someone deciding to birth a baby without any outside help, be it an MD, midwife, doula, etc. I know it comes across as VERY unorthodox, even insane for someone to pass up regular, routine prenatal care.
Everything we do seems to be unorthodox and against the grain. We joined the Mormon church in 2003. We have never gotten our kids vaccinated. I chose chiropractic as a career, and more specifically, Upper Cervical Chiropractic. We have three kids and are expecting our fourth. We are planning an unassisted childbirth. Get the idea?
Why An Unassisted Childbirth?
January asked me to write this post so everyone could get an idea of what goes on from my end of all these crazy shenanigans. January did not make this decision on her own, and I would not expect her to. This has been a calculated decision on both our parts, and one we did not make lightly. Though I was more into the idea at first than she was.
Baby #1
With our oldest, we had the easiest birth experience. We lived in Tucson for almost all of it until right at the end when circumstances dictated that we had to move back up to Phoenix.
While in Tucson, we went to the birthing center for January’s regular checkups. During the course of her prenatal care, we had all the routine tests and screenings done. We had appointments with all three midwives at the birth center.
As January got closer and closer, the midwife at each appointment would palpate her belly and say “Yep. Head down.” Over and over we heard that, so obviously we thought everything was okay.
At 36 weeks, January had a second ultrasound and we found out that the baby was frank breech, meaning her head was up, as well as her feet. Needless to say, we were shocked.
Long story short, January and I moved back up to Phoenix and got under the care of a high risk OB/Gyn that she knew. He suggested we opt for the c-section, seeing as how our baby was breech and it might cause complications. We agreed, but not before putting together a birth plan (no silver nitrate in the eyes, no Hep B shot, etc.). He signed off on it and we had the c-section.
Altogether that was our least stressful experience. However, the nurses did not leave us alone at all. Neither of us could get more than an hour of sleep at a time. One particular nurse kept barging into the room and doing everything as loud as she could. That was exhausting and frustrating.
Baby #2
Once again, we went with a midwife with our second child. This time January went into active labor. We bought the birthing tub and everything else you can think of. We used it all, but none of it really helped. January was in labor for three days. I supported her as much as I could, sleeping only when she slept and encouraging her the rest of the time.
As time went on, and as January didn’t dilate past 2 cm, I started to grow concerned. My point of most concern was when the midwife asked me what I thought we should do. Now someone reading this might not think this is a big deal, but to me it was.
I was in my third week of tri 2 at Parker (basically still in the very beginning of the chiropractic program) and I didn’t know much about pregnancy, labor, and childbirth. I was so focused on supporting January that it wasn’t in my consciousness to know what to do. That’s why we paid over $3,000 to a midwife – so she would know what to do in this situation.
We ended up going to the hospital and found out that January had an infection. What kind? We don’t know… the doctor and nurses either didn’t bother finding out or didn’t tell us. Our doctor was some lady who looked and acted like she was strung out on three pots of coffee. I remember this doctor telling January she could never have a vaginal birth after this.
Again, January had another c-section. This time our baby had a 102 degree fever. The doctors and nurses kept him to monitor him until his vitals stabilized. I stayed with him the entire time, talking to him and stroking his little arms and shoulders. After an hour he was fine and I was able to bring him to January.
The whole time we were at the hospital, it was a constant fight for anything we wanted. They fought with us over taking our baby to do the tests. We had them done in the room. The pediatrician was rude to January. I know I am probably forgetting some things, but you get the point.
Overall, this experience was very stressful.
On the day we were to leave, we had to wait for the doctor to check us out. That didn’t happen for three hours. When it did, the nurses told me I couldn’t carry my own baby to the car, that they had to do it and show me how to buckle his car seat. Literally, they told me that was the way it was and I didn’t have a choice. I told the nurse that we already had one child and I knew how to buckle a car seat. She shook her head. It did not matter.
At this point, I was so pissed that I carried baby #1 in one arm and baby #2 in his car seat in the other and told the nurse I was carrying him. I gave her a look that said “Just try and take my son and see what happens.”
From our room to the elevator, through the lobby, and out to the car took about five minutes. Now think about doing a sustained isometric contraction for five minutes holding a car seat at an awkward angle, arm slightly flexed the entire time. By the time I set baby #2 down in the car, my right arm was about ready to explode. I was so angry with this place and those nurses that nothing was going to get me to put my son down, including an exploding biceps muscle.
Baby#3
We went the midwife route once again for baby #3. Once again, it was a big mistake. We were in Arizona at the time, as this was when I took a leave from school.
Our midwife dropped us from care when January hadn’t gone into labor at 42 weeks. As it was, our midwife was seeing us ‘under the radar’. In Arizona, it is illegal for a midwife to attend a home birth for a woman that has had a c-section. She wanted January to do things to induce labor, but January wouldn’t. I think she was fearful of what would happen if something went wrong. I understand that. However, she probably should not have taken us on as clients in the first place.
So what did we do? We found a certified nurse midwife (CNM) that would take us that late. Because our home birth midwife had been “breaking the law” by caring for January, we couldn’t tell the CNM that we actually had prenatal care. We promised to protect our midwife and we held true to that promise. From the CNM’s standpoint, we probably came across as very irresponsible.
When she went through her protocol, though, she found out that January was actually very educated. Who knows what she thought then. According to her calculations (due to a late ultrasound), January was actually only 38 weeks.
One thing I will say about January: she knows her dates and when conception was, without a doubt. There was no way she was only 38 weeks.
When January went into labor, we were going to see if we could go the unassisted route, although this was never our plan. January had really bad back labor the third time around. Again, I slept only when she slept and supported her the best I knew how. The unassisted thing didn’t work out for us then. It was a choice we made on the fly, not with weeks and weeks of mental preparation.
Eventually, we decided to go to the hospital. Again, the usual routine: fighting with the nurses and doctor about everything. It was different though. This hospital was in central Phoenix where these nurses and doctors were used to dealing with non-English speaking teenage mothers (this is according to one of our nurses). While January is not that, there was still the feeling that the nurses and doctors thought very little of us.
Eventually, January was able to start pushing. Remember the first two were c-sections, so this was her first real birth. Everything was going fine… until the CNM showed up.
As our baby was being pushed out, she reached in, grabbed the baby by the neck and pulled. She then proceeded to reach in and severely tear January. Instead of letting everything happen naturally, she meddled and made things worse.
Over the course of the next couple days, they wanted to run every test under the sun, such as a GBS test, a blood sugar test (a diabetes screening test), etc. Baby #3 was born 5 lbs 9 oz at 43 weeks 6 days. Obviously, she was not diabetic. Not wanting a repeat of our experience with baby #2 , I belligerently refused all tests. January eventually caved in because she was so tired and didn’t want any problems.
Because of this, the CNM called social services on us for refusing all tests. When January informed them that we (she) had in fact agreed to all tests, and proved it, they left us alone. The CNM called them because she was tired of being bothered by other nurses coming to her, asking what they should do whenever we questioned (or initially refused) a test.
She came from the standpoint that we were uneducated and irresponsible. Those are the type of people she was used to seeing. Instead of investigating the situation, even just a little, she jumped to a conclusion about us.
I can truly say I have zero respect for that woman.
Baby #4
Needless to say, after four failed experiences with a midwife and three stressful experiences with a hospital, I did not want a repeat.
I know not all midwives are bad, just like not all chiropractors are bad, or lawyers, etc. With the combination of not finding many midwives that will take on a client that has had two c-sections, plus the fact that I personally don’t have enough faith in a midwife to pay one $3,000 or more, that route has not been an option for us this time.
Last fall, I went to a Lunch and Learn at school. The speaker was Dr. Jeannie Ohm. She is very instrumental in the success of the International Chiropractic Pediatric Association (ICPA). She and her husband had six kids, the first four being at home, unassisted and unhindered.
This really, really made an impression on me. What also made an impression on me was the fact that she was so young and naïve to all the external negative factors that “could happen” at childbirth with her first four. It really hit me that we have been making childbirth a complicated thing and we didn’t need to.
So I came home and told January that I thought we should have an unassisted pregnancy and childbirth. At first she was shocked and not open to it. Ironically, she brought this up to me when she was pregnant with Annabelle and I was shocked and not open to it then, until the very end when we were doing everything to avoid going to the hospital.
But as time went on, she eventually agreed and that decision has brought us here. Her health has been monitored the whole pregnancy. In the past, I remember the midwives coming over, checking January’s blood pressure, listening for the baby, and then chatting the rest of the time. I can do, and have done, all this without spending $3,000. We’ve made sure January has been under Upper Cervical Chiropractic care the entire time, so that she’s holding her adjustments and her body is staying balanced and aligned.
Overall, January and I are doing this because we both need a healing experience. Not just her, but me, too. Just once, I would like to actually enjoy and revel in the magnificence of my beautiful wife as she gives birth to our fourth child, free from the interference and fears of MDs, nurses, midwives, and doulas.
That is why we have chosen to go the unassisted route.
