Posted by January Harshe on April 29, 2009
This post is not a rant or educational (or maybe it will be to someone). It is just a post about a little of this and a little of that.
I am 34 weeks pregnant now and am FINALLY in the place I have been struggling to get to for the last…oh, 34 weeks! I feel wonderful about being pregnant, I am definitely more in tune, I am eating how I feel best and I am ready to birth this baby!
I am in a mode right now where I am ready to get everything prepared and ready for my birth and I want my house clean at ALL times. Some may refer to this behavior as nesting. It is bad though. If there is any clutter or dirty dishes or toys out, I tell my husband, “I don’t want to live like white trash, I need this clean!”. LOL. Somehow I have equated a little mess with living like white trash. Ya, I am hormonal.
We are going to be taking a CPR/Neonatal resuscitation class and ordering a few birth supplies soon. Oh, and I am going to be getting maternity pictures this time. I am very excited about that. I will of course share.
I am really feeling that I am going to have this baby between 38-40 weeks. Now, if you know me, this is almost ridiculous. Laughable, really. I had my last baby VBA2C at 43 weeks and 6 days and my 2nd baby at 42 weeks! The main reason I am feeling I will not go so far post dates is because I am so mentally sound and ready to have this baby at home with just myself and my husband present. I have let go of all fears. I have faith that this is going to be a beautiful, healing experience.
Now, on one hand I hesitate to make that claim. I know mothers who say they thought they were going to have their baby “early” and then go ‘late’. We all cook our babies different and each baby comes when he or she is ready. So, in that sense there is no late or early. This baby will come when he or she is in perfect health to meet us! On the other hand, I can be very in tune, so we’ll see what happens!
About Braxton Hicks contractions. Also referred to as practice contractions or false labor, etc. They really are none of the above in my opinion. I refer to them as “tightenings” and I LOVE them! They let me know my uterus and body are exercising and getting ready to help assist my baby in coming earthside. Also, they are mentally preparing me for birth.
I have been reading Hypnobirthing. Brandon is now reading it as well. I’ll have another post dedicated to this book. But for now, I just want to say that I use my tightenings as an opportunity to relax. I truly feel my last two labors were so long and painful ( 72 and 54 hours active labor) because of 2 reasons. First is fear. Second is tensing up and fighting my body in what it is trying to do best…birth a baby! Contractions are associated with fear and pain in our country. I had the hardest time just relaxing and letting go.
So, even when I get these practice tightenings, my first thought is pain. Tense up January, oh that hurts. Now that I know more and have let go of fears and misconceptions of what birth ’should be’, I just breathe through them and enjoy them. Sometimes my whole belly gets tight. Other times I feel it in my ligaments. My body is awesome and it is working with my baby already!
I am curious to see if these tightenings turn into a more regular prodromal labor at some point. I had this with my last baby for about a week. That can be a little more tiring as they can be a tad bit more intense and regular. I know many mamas who can experience this for weeks! I hope that this time, if I am to experience prodromal labor, I can continue loving the process and letting go.
One other thing to mention. There is one part of me I am looking forward to having back after I have this baby and that is my amazing patience. This pregnancy and my last have been hard for me when it comes to being patient with my children. I know it’s hard on them too, because they are used to a very laid back mommy. I have very high expectations of what I should be like as a parent and it kills me when I do not feel I am living up to that. So, that is the only thing that I am wishing were different. I’ll take it though. I have a beautiful family, a healthy pregnancy and a wonderful birth to look forward to!
Posted by January Harshe on April 28, 2009
I do not even know where to begin. Actually, I am going to go away and come back because I am too emotionally worked up right now to write a coherent post about this!
OK, I have calmed down. A little. Today, my emotional fire about birth began with an email. I emailed a doula friend of mine and asked her if she would be willing to support a mama who wanted an unassisted childbirth. This doula is awesome! She truly trusts birth and honoring the choices of the pregnant/birthing mother.
Her reply informed me that she could not due to personal things going on in her life and that she did not know of anyone to recommend to support this mama. Apparently everyone is ‘jumpy’ as she put it. The state they are in is cracking down on midwives and doulas who ‘honor women’s birthing choices’.
WHAT?! Since when does the goverment get to tell a woman how to birth and tell other women that they can not support the birthing mama?! So, here is a mama wanting an unhindered birth and having a hard time of finding any support at all. She wants to birth how God (or nature or whatever you believe in) made her body to birth with no interference from people coming at her with fear (or knives) and no one can or will becasue they are afraid of their butts getting prosecuted for it. Hmmmm, should we get out the stakes and start burning those who are different once again?
We live in a time where it is all about ‘tolerance’. Tolerance for all races (which I agree with of course), for gay marriage, for pornography, abortion, etc. “To each their own”. We live in a day where doctors, the AMA, and the media can push the fear of death all over the place when it comes to things like birth and the swine flu! We live now, right now, when pharmceutical companies jump on these opportunities to make BILLIONS of dollars from the fears of others. We tolerate all of this. But, if someone wants to tune out the media, wants to educate themselves, wants to keep drugs out of their bodies and believe in their innate intelligence, have faith in God and wants to have an unassisted birth, there is NO tolerance! Are you kidding me?!
Fear mongering. That is the best way I can describe it. Fear is contagious and it catches on more quickly than any ‘deadly’ disease! I am not about to be man handled (literally) again because of fear. I have worked through my fears. I have faith in myself, my body, my baby, my God! I know I can birth this baby without having my vagina cut. Without someone pulling on my baby’s head, without DRUGS! The interference is what causes most problems.
Infant mortality rates are still high in our country because of premature babies being born too often. My last baby was born at 44 weeks! If I had just given into fears or listened to any doctor and even some midwives, they would have wanted to cut me open at 38-40 weeks tops! That would have been 4-6 weeks to early for that baby! Can you imagine? As my chiropractor at the time put it, “She would have been severly compromised!” Good thing I fought for what I knew was right.
I do not care who supports what I am doing and who does not. I do not care what others think. I have to live with my birth experiences, no one else. And especially not the government or some doctor who does not know me. With my last birth (my VBA2C), the doctor who I had never met before this, came into my room, looked at me, gloved up and put his hand in my vagina! No introduction, didn’t ask, nothing. He thought because I was a woman on my back in labor that he was in control of me. I literally yelled at him, “GET OUT OF ME”! And he did.
In my opinion home birth is much, much safer than hospital birth. For me, the safest birth option at this point is an unassisted birth. To all the birthing women and any man who may support a birthing mama, read this again and again: EDUCATE YOURSELF, FIND YOUR VOICE AND DO WHAT IS BEST FOR THE MAMA AND BABY! This will be different for everyone. Do not look to others, especially doctors and hospitals for this answer. Look within. Once you find what the right thing is for you, DO NOT WAIVER. EVER.
Posted by January Harshe on April 27, 2009
OK, I got myself way too worked up today about birth. So much so, that I just couldn’t write about it. I need to calm down, digest and sort through my thoughts and come back to it.
In the meantime, I want to gag every time I check my mail on yahoo. There is always a pic of someone with a useless mask on their face. This whole thing is ludicrous!
So, go here and read what my hubby has to say about it. I totally agree and am wowed by the statistics he looked up!
In the meantime, we’ll keep our bodies free of interference in this family and not worry about it! 
